"Dearest Blackout #9"

After a night

of drinking

in my closet

& searching for Narnia,

I thunder down

your track until

a dead stop

pops my body

lifeless.



Darkness, a space

of undefined time—

did I die?

My toes are numb

the sheets, they rub

nails across steel.

Pickled skin

pricked purple-pink,

the bruises that won’t heal.

The taste inside my mouth—

I need water. I need

to escape this cave,

this nothingness.



24 hours

& I’m a train

emerging

through the fog

my awareness ahead

an aura tunneling me

forward.

I open my eyes

& everything

is magnified:

Terror,

Bewilderment,

Frustration,

Despair.

I run into your closet

once again

hoping for release.


About the author

Laurie Kolp’s poems have appeared in the Southern Poetry Anthology VIII: Texas, Stirring, Whale Road Review, Pith, Rust + Moth, and more. Her poetry books include the full-length Upon the Blue Couch and chapbook Hello, It's Your Mother. An avid runner and lover of nature, Laurie lives in Southeast Texas with her husband, three children, and two dogs.


Laurie Kolp